~Through the Cold~

"Whatever You have commanded us we will do, and wherever You send us we will go"~Joshua 1:16

I'd like to be like a flower poking through the snow - stubborn and determined to bring glory to it's Creator despite the cold and all the things trying to destroy it...

Some areas of France are beautiful.. Some not so much.. Some people in France are beyond kind, friendly, loving, & shining with the light of Christ... Others not so much.. It's the same with anywhere you live as a Christian, your surroundings can feel dark, lonely, and sad.. We're always going against the flow, longing to get somewhere, to make a difference for Jesus. I often end the day feeling frustrated - that I haven't learned more French, haven't made many friends, haven't told anyone about my Savior.. Then I'll start my day in frustration - because I didn't get up when I planned, my hair doesn't look the way I want it to, my abilities are small compared to my tasks etc. As I sit here thinking on all these things I realize I stay annoyed at myself because I'm the only one I'm focused on. And yes I'm the only one I CAN work on or change or have "control" of, but being self-centered is such a miserable way to live. What a confusing balance I'm looking for! To focus on changing ME and becoming more like Christ, who didn't focus on Himself but others around Him, and pleasing His Father... While I'm also trying to not focus on ME but on helping others and telling others and loving others... How does this work??
Once, when I was a teenager my Mom was teaching the youth class at church and she gave us all a little yellow card that said "I'm 3rd". I was taught to put God First, Others Second, and Myself Third. So maybe this is what I should be learning, again.. That yes I need to concentrate on me and realizing my own sin and need for Jesus, and need for change in my life. But focusing more on God and His glory. And on others and their needs - for love and God's Word etc.
So as my cheesy thoughts of flowers and snow go... while I'm asking for that determination to continue trying to live for Jesus, I need to remember to look over and realize there are many other "flowers" trying to stand in the cold too, and there are many that are buried completely under the snow and don't even realize there's a way out..

So maybe I won't be quite so frustrated if I choose to remember that God's 1st, others are 2nd, and I'm 3rd.